Not gonna lie, this week was hard. First off, Alfredo and Mirna did not get baptized this weekend. We had zero baptisms in the month of August and the goal we had commited to achieve was to baptize 5 people, and of that 5, 2 families. Alfredo and Mirna don´t even really seem to have any real doubts. They both say they know this is the true church and have felt the spirit in the lesson and they recognize that God has blessing them since we started visiting them. But they keep saying "It´s so fast". Alfredo and Mirna were gonna go with us to see a baptism on Saturday and are reluctance to accept a new set baptismal date.It´s so hard because I feel like I´ve been doing everything I can and putting my whole heart and energy into helping Alfredo and Mirna and they still didn´t get baptized.
Before we thought Alfredo was the one who had doubts, but now we´re pretty positive it´s Mirna because yesterday we shared a video with them that showed events from Jesus´s life and when the video finished the first thing Alfredo said was, "Look, Jesus Christ was baptized too". I´m pretty sure he already knew that, but it was cool that THAT was the part of the movie that stood out to him. He had baptism on his mind. He basically told us he´s willing to get baptized without Mirna. Mirna says it´s a step they need to take together as husband and wife, but there´s something that´s holding her back, we´re just not sure what it is. We found out one of the thing´s that was causing doubts was that their neighbors and family members have been mocking them "What, you´re Mormon now?", but we brought some members with us to the lesson who could really relate to that because they passed through the same thing, so they shared their experience and how they moved forward and also bore their testimonies of the blessings they´ve received since baptism. So I think that helped them.
Anyway, we´re still working with them and have asked them to pray about the date September 14th for their baptism. Please keep praying for them. I want so much to see this family get baptized before transfers. I know they are ready for it.
Juan and Marta had accepted a baptismal date for September 13th and were both commited to coming to church on Sunday (it would have been Juan´s first time), but neither of them went. Juan decided to do an extra job and Marta decided to stay home cook lunch for him so that when he got home tired from working, he´d have a meal. We´re tried to convice her to make something for him and leave it and go with us to church, but she stayed. Erg, I don´t understand why they´re backtracking! We´ve already taught them about keeping the Sabbath Day holy, but we´re gonna review it with them. Also, Marta´s sons keep promising they´re gonna go to church and never do. The only one who went yesterday was Reyna. She is progressing well and has a goal to finish the Book of Mormon. She even paid a fast offering yesterday! Awesome! But she doesn´t have a baptismal date right now because she has a boyfriend who is married and separated from his wife and in the process of divorce and marry her. So she can´t get baptized while she´s dating him because he´s a married man and who knows how long it will take for him to finish his divorce. I wish she would just drop him and get baptized. But obviously we can´t even suggest that. She´s gotta decide what to do.
Juan and Marta won´t be able to get baptized on the 13th because Juan hasn´t even been to church once yet and he has to go at least twice before his baptism. We also keep reminding them about their wedding and asking them if they´ve started making plans and have decided on a place to hold it, but they keep saying "We´re working on it. We want to make plans when it gets a little closer." It´s less than two weeks away! Or would have been. But now we have to move the baptismal date and they also seem reluctant to accept a new set date. We´ve asked them to pray about the 20th.
We had to drop one of the family we dragged to church last Sunday. Turns out their hearts really weren´t in it and they only when to church cuz we insisted so much. It´s hard to find a balance between giving your all/doing everything that´s possible to help people take the steps to come unto Christ and pressuring so much that we don´t know if the people are acting in faith or only acting because we´re insisting so much.
Alfredo and Mirna came to church again, which was a relief because I was afraid we had pressured them so much that now they weren´t gonna keep coming to church.
And if this week wasn´t already stressful enough, it´s really costing me with my companion. We´re very different. Plus, with all the time we´ve been spending make plans for lessons and other things to help Alfredo and Mirna, we´ve gotten really behing on training and I don´t feel like my comp is improving very much. Maybe I´m not teaching her enough, or effectively enough. I kinda feel like I´m failing as a trainer this time around. I could use some extra prayers.
I´m sorry this is kind of a downer letter. But the truth, a mission isn´t easy. It´s a refiner´s fire. I hope these experience help me to be a better person and grow closer to Jesus Christ.
This Thursday, we´re having a meeting with some general authorities- one name Elder Alonzo and the other is the Young Men´s general president. I hope I can receive some good personal revelation on how to be a better trainer. Love you all. Thank you for your support. Hermana Hawkins